A Difference of Opinion
by Arlene
Summary: When Bruce and Dick fight, Alfred steps in to resolve the situation


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**From:** [c_pon@j...][30]  
**Date:** Fri Mar 23, 2001 10:14pm  
**Subject:** Fic: A Difference of Opinion  
  

    
    Title:A Difference of Opinion
    Author: Arlene
    Rating: G
    Disclaimer: Not mine. Never will be. *sniff*
    Summary: Alfred plays peacemaker.
    Inspired by recent events. Dedicated to Kat for willingly putting up
    with all us nutcases.=)
    A Difference of Opinion
    As Alfred entered the Manor with the last bag of groceries, something
    about the atmosphere of the old house seemed disturbing, tense.
    SLAM!
    Oh dear. He recognized the sound. Master Dick's bedroom. How many
    times must he tell that boy . . .
    SLAM!
    Ah, the study door. They had yet another fight. He directed his
    thoughts towards his "eldest." How many times must he tell that
    boy . . .
    As he transported the groceries to the kitchen, he shook his head
    sadly. They were so close when they were younger. Both so trusting,
    so open. He sighed. As charming as they used to be together, the
    fighting was inevitable, really. Cut from the same cloth, they were.
    He was reminded of the old song: "When an irresistible force meets an
    unmovable object . . ."
    Alfred mentally shook himself. Young Master Dick was his own man now,
    with his own home, his own life. His visits had become so infrequent
    that Alfred needed to at least attempt to solve this new problem, so
    that the visit would last longer and end better than the previous one
    had.
    Finished with his unpacking and organizing, he checked his watch to
    make sure enough time had elapsed before approaching the irresistible
    force's bedroom.
    After knocking, a muffled "Come in," greeted him. He opened the door
    and directed his gaze towards the bed. Although he knew what he would
    see, the sight still filled him with a bit of nostalgia. Master Dick
    lay on his back upon his bed, pillow over his face, limbs spread out.
    Just as he had when he was an adolescent.
    The elderly man sat on the edge of the bed, carefully so as not to
    jostle the younger man.
    "Master Dick?" he inquired softly.
    The pillow replied something unintelligible.
    "Master Dick," he chided gently, "You know full well I cannot speak
    the language of Pillows. I believe I have made the point before."
    Mercifully, the offending piece of bedding was removed to reveal a
    smiling face. "I'm sorry, Alfred. I keep forgetting to hire a
    translator for you."
    Alfred returned the smile. "Quite alright, young sir. I shall
    endeavor to learn the foreign tongue when I retire." Back to
    business. "Now, about the door . . . ?" A raised eyebrow prompted
    Dick to speak.
    "Uh, well, it's stupid, really. I rented a movie, y'know, two guys
    trying to bond. I mean, we were both free, no cases going on and
    we're family an' all, so I thought this'd be kinda fun. Well, Bruce
    turns it into a character study --it was supposed to be fun fer
    cryin' out loud!-- then compares it to the original written version,
    which he likes better. Now, I actually read the original version
    before, so I knew what he was talking about, but that ending was just
    so depressing. I mean, c'mon, she dies at the end! So I tell him my
    opinion, and, if you can believe it, things actually get *worse* from
    there. Ugh! I'm an adult now and he still makes me so mad!" The
    pillow returned to cover the face, which had lost the smile during
    the ramble.
    Alfred had tried hard not to roll his eyes during the discourse.
    Aside from being quite ungentlemanly, it achieved nothing. Instead,
    he stood up. "Dinner in fifty-five minutes, young sir. Do not forget
    to wash under the nails," he inform the young man crisply." He gently
    closed the door on the muffled "Yes, Alfred" on his way out.
    Making his way to the study, and subsequently down to the Master's
    favorite sulking place, he pondered upon resolving the seemingly
    small conflict.
    He allowed the soles of his shoes to tap lightly on the stone steps
    leading to the lowest level of the Manor. He knew his presence would
    be noted as soon as he opened the clock, but he wanted Master Bruce
    to know that he meant business this time.
    A few steps away from the chair facing the vast computer display, he
    cleared his throat. "Sir?" he addressed to the back of the chair.
    The Batman grunted.
    "Master Dick seemed rather upset when I talked to him."
    The Batman grunted yet again.
    Like squeezing water from a stone. Unmovable object, indeed. He
    straightened his posture.
    "Dinner in fifty minutes, young sir. Do not forget to wash under the
    nails."
    "Yes, Alfred," Bruce mumbled.
    Satisfied, Alfred made a smart about-face and left to prepare the
    meal.
    At a few minutes before the appointed time, both Bruce and Dick
    entered the dining room, both still peeved with one another. As they
    silently sat down at their place settings, Alfred emerged from the
    kitchen.
    "Sirs, dinner shall be slightly delayed."
    Both men gaped. This was an extremely rare occurrence. Either the
    meal was still not ready (unheard of!) or something was up.
    "It has come to my attention that there has been a difference of
    opinion which has resulted in mounting tensions and the . .
    slamming . . of . . doors." He was careful to enunciate the last
    part, reminding them of the house rules during their upbringing and
    hoping to shame them a bit. Then he pulled out his trump card. "Sirs,
    I realize that I am only a humble servant," he noted with
    satisfaction that they guiltily looked down at the tablecloth, "and
    that it is not my place to say, but I feel compelled to state that I
    care about your mental as well as your physical well-beings. Now, it
    would do this old heart some good if the meal I have so pain-
    stakingly prepared can be fully enjoyed as intended. Sirs, for my
    sake, would you please resolve your differences?" Careful with the
    guilt, old man, he reminded himself, too much would be overdoing it.
    Irresistible force met unmovable object. Something's got to give.
    "He's right, Dick," Bruce sighed. "I liked the original story better,
    and I was a little disappointed that you didn't." Alfred noted that
    he did not actually say "I'm sorry." Well, at least he made the first
    move.
    The fact was not lost on Dick. "Yeah, I'm sorry too, Bruce. I just
    wanted to relax with you and do something fun. I shouldn't have
    bitten your head off like I did."
    "Okay, I admit it was a fun movie. And thanks for bringing it." As
    the conversation continued, Alfred quietly left to begin the first
    course. When he returned with the salad, he was glad to hear their
    playful banter.
    Bruce was sitting back in his chair, slightly slouching, wearing his
    half smile. "She's an airhead!"
    "Yeah, like your dates!" Dick's elbows were on the table, body
    leaning forward, giving as good as he got.
    "At least they know what a *fork's* for!"
    "Low blow, Bruce," he grinned. "Don't you dare compare her naïveté to
    your dates' low IQ's."
    "Ahem." Both younger men immediately straightened their postures and
    sat up properly.
    Seeing that it was safe now, Alfred served his boys and attempted to
    satisfy his piqued curiosity. "May one inquire as to the program
    which was viewed?"
    Dick answered. "The Little Mermaid."
    "Ah." All this ill will begun over a cartoon? Although he loathed the
    violence his boys faced every night, he had the urge to smack them
    upside the head with one of his crepe pans.
    Bruce spoke up. "Alfred? What are we having for dinner?"
    "Fish, Master Bruce." As the old gentleman made his way back to the
    kitchen, he failed to understand what could have prompted the
    laughing at the dining table.
    End
    

  


**Replies**
**Author**
**Date**

10736 
[Re: Fic: A Difference of Opinion][28]
[vandalia@v...][31]
Fri 3/23/2001 

10742 
[Re: Fic: A Difference of Opinion][32]
Chicago 
Sat 3/24/2001 

10761 
[Free Lunch (was RE: Fic: A Difference of Opinion)][33]
Robin 
Sat 3/24/2001 

10740 
[Re: Fic: A Difference of Opinion][34]
[SKHwrite@a...][35]
Sat 3/24/2001 

10741 
[Re: Fic: A Difference of Opinion][36]
[efrancis@e...][37]
Sat 3/24/2001 

10758 
[FB: A Difference of Opinion][38]
Robin 
Sat 3/24/2001 

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